Friday, August 10, 2012

Life As Canvas...

I try to start my new posts with a photo that serves as a lead in for the content.  The above photo and it's message hit me today.  You could say I had another "ah-ha" moment.  They happen pretty often lately-I guess that's a good thing.  Anyway, I was tooling around FaceBook (yes, I caved and went back) and saw a photo of a man I recognized.  I don't know him personally, but I know of him very well.  You see, this man lost his entire family to the most horrific crime I can recall in Connecticut.  His wife and two daughters were brutally murdered, and he sustained injuries from a vicious attack.  My moment of realization came when I saw the picture of him and his new wife on their wedding day!

I've followed this case in the news (even from Hawaii) since the day it happened. I've seen photos, interviews and stories of this man in his darkest days. I've wept for him and his family. I've sent love and light to him. I wouldn't call it stalking, but because this happened so very close to my home town, I've taken a personal interest in the case. This photo stirred up such an emotion in the pit of my stomach, I was inspired to write about it and what it means to me.  To see this man, who was once so torn to shreds, looking so content and unbelievably happy, brought tears to my eyes.  He overcame the most painful experience I'd image he'll ever go through, and managed to find happiness again.

We've all experience pain in some form.  I'm not talking about the physical, ouch, type of pain.  I'm talking about the pit of your stomach, keep you up at night, want to jump off a bridge pain of emotion.  Everyone on this planet has their own story of woe.  We can all relate to each other in that sense.  Some have endured more pain than others and in different capacities and circumstances.  Bottom line is, when your heart hurts, it hurts badly.  That is the pain we have all felt.  I don't want to use this space as a pity party with examples, but I think you get the idea of what I'm talking about.  I've been seeing examples of overcoming this type of pain all around me lately.  Friends who'd been told "no kids" having babies, friends losing loved ones yet using that loss to enrich their lives with happiness.  Dr. Petit is just one of many examples I've seen of people making lemonade out of the rotten lemons life has thrown at them.  I can't help but stop and take a look at my own life.  What could possibly be so bad in my life that I am miserable every day, or even for one minute?  Absolutely nothing!  I have the most loving husband.  I have a fantastic family, immediate and extended.  I have the best friends I could ask for, near and far.  I have my health.  I have a pretty great roof over my head.  I have a brain in my head that can get me through anything, financially or otherwise.  Oh, and I have a backyard view to die for!
From time to time, we all have days when we just want to throw in the towel and say "why me".  We have the roller coaster of emotions that cause us to laugh, cry, yell and sit in silence.  Some of these occasions last longer than others.  It's what we do with these experiences that make us better people.  Like the photo says, if you don't like your canvas, change the painting.  We truly are the controllers of our own destiny.  Our perceptions of the life around us shape the path that we will travel.  If we continue to look at life through the eyes of a victim, we will continually be the victim.  I, for one, have adopted a new philosophy when it comes to life's little challenges.  I look to see how they can make me a better person, or how they can make my life better.  Sometimes it takes a while to clear the smoke before I see the answer, but there is always an answer.  There are positives to every negative....that's just the way of life, like yin and yang.

I have a picture thingy hanging in my hallway that says "life is a balance between holding on and letting go".  This picture does not  match my decor at all, but the message is huge.  I've had this thing for about twelve years now (back when I decorated totally country...???) and I can't seem to throw it away (ironic, I know).  I read it daily and try to practice it often.  I have let go of the past.  It is no longer relevant.  I've cut ties with friends who brought toxicity into my life.  I've made amends with people or situations that hurt me.  I've forgiven the sins of others and myself.  I've come to terms with all of those lemons, and am fully enjoying the drink of my life.  We all have wounds, people, time to rip off that bandaid and let them heal.  Let the past go and start living in the here and now.  I guarantee you will have pitchers and pitchers of drink to share with those around you.  Hell, maybe someone will bring vodka!











Life's a beach, and then you live on one...







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